Friday

She didn’t wake up to drink it…yet. I left it and the straw next to the card that arrived for her today. You open the card and it plays the song “Day by Day.” Good song. I like the DC Talk version better.

When I wheeled Dad down to visit Mom this morning, she didn’t open her eyes at all. She did do something Dad and I thought was remarkable. Jen had called my phone and left a message of the kids singing a song for “Ammaw.” The song is called “My God Is So Big.” I played the message for Mom.

While it was playing, her facial expression was visibly different. Pensive you might say. Intently listening. Especially when Abby, her little Abby (she is pretty much a small version of Mom) blurted out the words to the song when the rest of the kids had finished. She followed her version with this very clear directive: “Love you Ammaw! Wake up!!! Come play!”

Even Ella joined in. She’s so advanced for almost 5 months old. She laughed on cue to be recorded. Seriously, she happened to laugh after Abby said what she said and it was caught on the message. Ammaw definitely, visibly, leaned ever so slightly – like not 3 inches, only about 1/2 to 3/4 of an inch or so – but it was a lean toward the sound.

When Drew (a friend who was passing through town) and I visited her at 5, she did open her eyes. Only for about a second, and only about an eighth of an inch, but she did. She didn’t open them again, she didn’t respond to anything else, and she’s still in a coma, but she opened her eyes briefly. The neuro-surgeon again today told us to be hopeful. She is making positive steps. They are small, but they are positive.

A friend of ours bought Mom an iPod Shuffle for me to load with some music and clip to her pillow case and stick in her ears for her to listen to. When Mom would be over at the house with Jen, there would often be a playlist of music playing. Mom really liked it. That’s what I loaded on there – about 60 songs or so. It’s been playing in her ears since about 5 today. Hope she likes it.

Hopefully the hope of each song will echo deep into her bruised head. Hopefully it will remind her of the hope we have because of the God who came near, who was not far away when the accident occurred. He was near. Very near. As He is to us all.

The day was up and down for us. Dad really seemed to appreciate seeing Mom this morning. After getting settled back into his room, several things happened that were kind of downers.

1 – The case worker told me that neither Mom nor Dad got accepted to the long-term care facility we had looked into. Last week, we were disappointed because the one that had been so highly recommended ended up being out of network for their insurance. The next one we looked into, which is in network, denied admittance to both of them this morning. They said Dad had progressed too much to qualify for long term care, and Mom was not a case they wanted to take on. Come one, Dad – quit getting better why don’t you!?

I was bummed. I could tell Dad was, too. They would have shared a room and been well taken care of.

So, we are researching two other options. Referrals have been written already for one of the other two. And, I will tour the other one in the morning at 9am. I pray that one of these will work out. One of them would allow Mom and Dad to be in the same building, but not in the same room. The other one would put them into two different facilities about 15 minutes from each other. We don’t want that, but we may have to go with it. Reason why? Because Mom and Dad’s health issues are very different. Mom needs brain attention. Dad needs bone attention. It’s all good. We just want the best care for each of them.

2 – We found out the insurance will not pay a dime toward transporting them back to Orlando once Dad can walk. We were bummed, cause I think Dad really wants to get them both back there once he is able to bear weight on his legs.

3 – I told Dad about them both getting denied to the facility we thought they would settle in by the end of this week. I think getting into that next facility will bring some evidence for progress to Dad for both Mom and him. That would be good.

They are moving Mom out of ICU some time Friday. They say she is stable enough to step down from ICU. It’s sort of strange to hear that about a person who is in a coma. However, she is breathing on her on. She is handling the food from the feeding tube now. She is not responding to commands at all. But, she would get great treatment there that would move her toward waking up and beginning rehab.

Dad really is doing well. I mean, he can’t bear weight on either leg for another 3 to 5 weeks. He can’t take off his collar for another 3 to 5 weeks. His left wrist (he is left-handed) will have to be re-broken and repaired eventually. But, his ribs are healing. His lung is not collapsed anymore. His upper left arm has been surgically repaired and is healing. His lower legs have been surgically repaired and are healing. And, his “road rash” is healing very, very well. That was a concern to the doctors. If you see him now compared to just a week ago, you can see why they denied him for long-term acute care. He will have to go to a “skilled nursing facility” next. We are looking for one connected with a hospital here.

Mom has not had a fever for over 24 hours. THAT’S HUGE!!! She had really been struggling with one. The doctors thought she was struggling with some infections. So far the one infection they did discover is being attacked and looks like it’s losing. Her one bedsore she had developed is almost gone. And her swelling in her arms and legs has gone way, way down. We are thankful. Still in a coma, but making progress.

While I was out getting Dad his afternoon latte today, a song from the shuffle I was listening to played in the car that really means a lot to me. I heard it the 1st time at a friend’s funeral as a celebration of the great God we serve and the hope we have in His coming. It floored me. Broke me. I wept and wept. I guess the weight of everything and the difficulty with logistics and the emotional high of being home this weekend coupled with the low of not being here with Mom and Dad and Erik all came to a head. It was a moment of pause and a moment of reminder and a moment to cry. Very necessary.

The song is called “Days of Elijah.” Very powerful. At one point, the bridge builds up as Twila Paris and the resounding choir behind her keep repeating, “There is no God like Jehova.” And there isn’t.

Our God is so big. His love is so big. He loved us first and hasn’t stopped. No matter what we face in life, we can trust that He loves us and holds us. After all, the havoc wreaked from what happened in the garden continues today, and it wasn’t his fault. He keeps showing us His love everyday that He so clearly demonstrated when He reaped at the cross what we had sown in the garden.

The promise of abundant life doesn’t mean an abundance of easy. He never promised safety. Our safety is not central to what He is up to. Our security is. We can rest in Him, His strength, His might, His love, no matter what. And we must not let the bigness of circumstances cause us to forget how big He really is.

That’s why the kids’ message on my phone that I played for Mom was so meaningful. For Mom, and for me. The words of the song they sang on that message are:

my God is so big
so strong and so mighty
there‘s nothing my God cannot do

my God is so big
so strong and so mighty
there‘s nothing my God cannot do

the mountains are His
the valleys are His
and everything in between too

my God is so big
so strong and so mighty
there‘s nothing my God cannot do

Thanks for reminding us of that Caleb and Katey and Abby, and even Ella.

I fly home tomorrow afternoon and come back Sunday night. Erik comes in for the weekend. I know he has struggled not being here. I am thankful he has been with his family, though.

Speaking of his family, his sweet wife is an amazing writer and blogs fairly regularly. Click here to read some of her latest posts. Very cool. Erik and I are very thankful for our wives. Erin and Jen are amazing.

Please pray for Mom’s healing and Dad’s continued progress. Please pray for the next step to be clear within the next few days. We know they will be transferred by early next week. Just trying to finalize where.

We love yall. Thanks for doing life with us through all of this.

-jason